Tag: Personal

I don’t avert my gaze this time,
I face the flaws, far from divine,
I want to see the truth, although,
Oh, I’m so scared to face it all.

I brace myself and face the light,
Hesitant steps, courage unite;
I’m terrified, my heart beats fast,
I feel it in my chest: aghast.

And simply then, when I’m most scared,
I am the bravest and I dare.
I lift my gaze and I look up
Into the eyes that stare right back.

I see myself with all my flaws,
Who I am now and who I was,
Reflection of a living soul,
With all the scars which make me whole.

I hated them, I was afraid,
Hated myself and felt ashamed,
Wanting to hide: even my sparks,
As imperfections seemed so vast.

Wanted perfection—but I’m not,
I’ll now accept what I have got,
The real me with ugly scars,
But with an endless repertoire.

I tell my story to myself,
I sing it, I am now prepared.
I tell my truth and who I am.
I see it now: imperfect gem.

– Patricia

Inspired by the way I’ve been feeling recently, as I’ve been focusing only on my physical imperfections and I felt ashamed, thinking “How could anyone see anything beautiful in me?”. I felt inferior and not good enough, after seeking perfection. And this limits the way I express myself and I can’t do it freely, without caring about what others think of me.

And I’ve been trying to remember how brave I’d learnt to be, facing my fears head on, something which I seem to have forgotten, in time. I wrote this poem with that thought in mind, imagining myself being the most afraid I’ve ever been and yet also being the bravest I have ever been and facing my fear.

In that moment, when I’m most scared, I’m the bravest I have ever been.